Tagged: Michael Konik

Neil Hamburger

Andy Kauffman. Tony Clifton…Jackie Mason — America’s glorious tradition of professional funnymen lives on in the fabulous Neil Hamburger.  Hamburger’s live act, which reportedly differs from his many celebrated albums, features a barrage of Socratic jokes, tough questions with tougher answers. If you’re his ex-wife, we’re sorry! Neil’s pacing is legendary, and he uses the abundance of mucus...

No Cost Too High in the Fight for Freedom

Some professor type at an East Coast university just presented a detailed analysis of how much the Iraq and Afghanistan wars will ultimately cost the American people, when you figure in healthcare costs for wounded and maimed veterans. And all the other stuff: bombs and radios and what have you. Supposedly the price tag will...

Sharing, Caring, Giving

Thanks to our good looks, superior intelligence, and unimaginable privilege, we’re rich! Do you know how much calla lilies cost at a reputable flower purveyor? We’ve got hundreds of them in our garden. Blood oranges? Also hundreds. We can’t eat them all, so we give them away. Same thing with our money. Since we’re into...

In Defense of Defense

Howard “Buck” McKeon represents California’s Twenty-fifth Congressional District, which is home to an Army fort, an Air Force base, a Navy weapons station, and a Marines mountain warfare training area. So if anyone is perfectly qualified to head the House Armed Services Committee it’s old Buck. Thank God that conflict of interest concerns don’t disqualify...

I Wanna Be Loved

The show is billed as “stories of Dinah Washington, Queen of the Blues.” And it is. But I Wanna Be Loved, which features all of Dinah’s hits, could just as easily be billed as “An Evening with Barbara Morrison.” L.A.’s Queen of Jazz & Blues is now confined to an electric wheelchair after diabetes-related operations. The scooter...

Celebrating Our National Sheriff of the Year

The Los Angeles Times needs to stop investigating Sheriff Lee Baca. Instead of undermining our top lawman’s authority with pointless reports about this or that allegation, the newspaper needs to focus on falling crime numbers, fewer accidental deputy shootings, and a measurable (if not statistically significant) percentage drop in gross negligence claims against the Sheriff’s...

Getting Good and Bad Mixed Up

Funny, isn’t it? The way things can get turned around completely backwards so that everything means the opposite? We don’t mean Orwellian doublespeak. We’re talking about common words that don’t seem to have a static definition. Like, say, the word “villain.” Pfc. Bradley Manning was called a villain, among many other pernicious names, in the...

Seeds of Solidarity

What if everyone who owns a lawn stopped growing grass and started growing food? What if we grew our vegetables on local plots instead of factory farms? The Massachusetts organization and education center Seeds of Solidarity believes that we should grow food everywhere — including urban and “inner-city” areas. The goal of Seeds of Solidarity...

Endorsement: Cardinal Roger Mahony for Pope!

The race is on! Now that everyone’s beloved Uncle Joe Ratzinger, also known as “Benedict,” has stepped aside, leaving the Papacy for a comfortable dotage on Vatican property, where he shall remain blissfully shielded from criminal prosecution for the rest of his days, someone (male) will wield the sceptre and wear the mitre! Who will win the title...

Fewer Police, More Peace

This will sound ridiculous. This will sound a little funny, sort of strange, not quite right. Like one of those “Modest Proposal” type satires we’ve been publishing lately. But this time we’re not kidding, not inverting meanings and uncovering absurdities. We’re serious. Here in Los Angeles – and probably in most major cities – there’s a...