Voter Guide for the Lazy and Disgusted, 2016 Edition
Four years ago, that notoriously smart egg Mrs. Konik voted for Jill Stein. This election cycle, we’re catching up with her prescience and good sense. We’re voting Green. Enthusiastically.
Casting our ballot for someone whose values are closely aligned with ours — as opposed to the lesser of two corrupt charlatans intent on making war — is the opposite of a “wasted” vote. It’s how democracy is meant to work. If you really believe you only have two candidates to choose from, you’ve been victimized by the relentless propaganda meant to convince Americans that we’re a binary nation, not a polyglot gumbo of myriad viewpoints. The so-called “two-party system,” which this time around produced two of the most vile candidates in our lifetime, has been exposed as a cancer on our Republic. We can do better. We will do better.
In Statewide races — notably for a seat in the U.S. Senate — we’re adamantly opposed to anything but progressive candidates. Which is why we’re not endorsing Democrats or Republicans for these offices. Also, we don’t think voting for judges is a good idea.
Our California Propositions, though, cut across party boundaries: they’re confusing to everyone. No worries. We offer our quadrennial public service to those who don’t have time or interest to closely read the Propositions, research the funders and form an educated opinion. Who has time to wade through the morass of legislative gobbledygook? We do. It was painful to read. Excruciating. But we made it. And here’s what we’ve concluded.
Prop 51 (School Bonds): NO. Unfortunately, the biggest beneficiaries of 51 aren’t students and teachers; it’s real estate developers.
Prop 52 (Medi-Cal Fees): YES. Imperfect and frustrating as 52 is, it protects the 1-out-of-6 Californians living in poverty.
Prop 53 (Revenue Bond Voter Approval): NO. Voters should exercise fiscal control be electing prudent representatives, not micro-managing infrastructure projects.
Prop 54 (Legislative Transparency): YES. More, please.
Prop 55 (Income Tax Extension): YES. We are not placing an “undue burden” on the rich; we are rewarding them with a chance to serve the society that enriched them.
Prop 56 (Tobacco Tax): YES. Philip Morris, RJ Reynolds and 7-11 stores have spent $100 million to promote ‘no.’ Any questions?
Prop 57 (Criminal Sentencing and Parole): YES. Criminal justice reform starts now.
Prop 58 (Bi-lingual Education): YES. Xenophobia is anathema to progress and harmony.
Prop 59 (Citizens United Repeal): YES. Unnecessary, ineffectual and largely symbolic though 59 may be, it’s the correct ideology.
Prop 60 (Porn Condom Use): NO. This one seems borrowed from a satirical novel. Let the People have their cumshots.
Prop 61 (State Prescription Drugs): YES. We don’t agree with Bernie Sanders 100% of the time. But on this one we sure do.
Prop 62 (Repeal Death Penalty): YES. Let the barbarism end.
Prop 63 (Gun Regulation): YES. And there ought to be more.
Prop 64 (Marijuana Legalization): YES. We’ve been calling for full legalization since publishing Reefer Gladness in 2010. The day has arrived.
Prop 65 (Carryout Bag Fees): NO. Plastic manufacturers once more exhibit their cynicism and greed. See #67, below.
Prop 66 (Accelerate Death Penalty): NO. See #62, above.
Prop 67 (Plastic Bag Ban): YES. This is the counterbalance to 65. Time to end polluting-for-profit in California.
Measure A (County Parks Tax): YES. Although, until our corrupt Department of Recreation and Parks (RAP) demonstrates that it’s able to manage its affairs competently, we’re hesitant to put more money under their control.
Measure M (Metro Sales Tax for Transportation): YES. This one actually seems to benefit the many instead of a few special interests.
Measure CC (Community College Bonds): YES. We spend three times as much on prisoners than we spend on students. Ante up.
Measure GG (Mountains Recreation and Conservancy Tax): NO. We supported this measure until learning that one of the three citizen overseers on the Commission is Stacy Sillins, an officer of “Friends of Runyon Canyon” who has proven herself untrustworthy.
Measure HHH (Homelessness Bond): YES. Homelessness is a national problem; locally, it’s a crisis. Doing nothing is not an option.
Measure JJJ (Affordable Housing Mandate): YES. Imperfect and possibly vexing in the short-term, JJJ is a step in the right direction.
Measure RRR (LA DWP Reform): YES. The DWP appears to a very naughty organization. It’s time to bring them to heel, as Madame Prez likes to say.
Measure SSS (Airport Police Pension): NO. Even the cops it would affect aren’t for it.